heels in bed

Guys love when you wear heels to bed.

Um, no, not to sleep in.

Guys love when you wear heels during sex.  And it doesn’t matter what type of heels they are, either — just about any will do, especially if it’s the first time.  Sure, you’ll eventually get to the point where you have a bunch of “bedroom” shoes, but for now you can start with those sexy 4-inch stilettos that you never wear out because they hurt your feet (though the studies say that wearing heels out will also help your sex life).

What’s that?  You have no sexy shoes?  Here are a few pairs to get you started:

Red OLSHAN Pumps, Aldo Shoes

$75

You know what they say about red…makes a matador go “hell yeah.”  Pumps are usually a hit, but they can occasionally be a miss.  If they’re something you’d wear to the office (and not in a “sexy secretary” sort of way), then you should probably not wear them to bed.  Especially if they’re the pumps you wear to the office before you change when you get to your desk.

Betsey Johnson Neville II Leopard Peep-Toes, Endless.com

$91

I love these leopard-print peep-toes.  They’re super sexy and feature a shiny, mirrored heel.  Plus, the tread is practically sneaker tread — just in case you ever do have the urge to wear them out.  If animal print’s not your style, try the romantic version of the Neville II in pale pink rose texture.  Peep-toes are a little sexier and more daring than pumps, but they’re still conservative enough for first-timers.

Pleaser Mid-Platform 6-inch Clear Heel, ODGirl.com

$44

This is a great introductory stripper shoe.  Yeah, you know lucite heels are sexy — plus, they’re usually a more affordable option (ranging from $35 – $75).  Stripper heels generally come in 6-, 7-, and 8-inch heel heights, though I have seen 5- and 9-inch shoes (these are rare, though).  Don’t be too scared off by the heel height, though, because a) the platform makes it a bit easier to cope with and b) if you’re walking very far in these shoes, you’re doing it wrong.

Pleaser Black Women’s Seduce Patent Boots, Shoes.com

$55

Over-the-knee (fake) patent leather boots?  What guy isn’t going to like these?  Yeah, that’s what I thought.  I actually own these — they’re not terribly high-quality, but they’re good enough for sex.  OTK boots are not the only sexy type of boot out there, however–knee-high boots can also be hot.  Just stay away from flat boots, slouchy boots, and rain boots.

Sexy Platform Maribou Shoes, WildFree.com

$45

These shoes make that old boudoir style (maribou) a little sexier with a clear plastic heel and platform.  These are a lot sexier than kitten heels, which really have no place in the bedroom (in my opinion).  The maribou trim can help take the hard edge off of the stripper shoe style, if that’s what you’re into.

Shoes not to wear:

UGGs, UGG Australia

$120 – $170

Under no circumstances is it okay to wear UGGs anywhere near the bedroom.  Honestly, you shouldn’t even wear them outside the bedroom, but I’m not going to judge.  Because they are ugly.  The name should give you a hint.

Steve Madden Zurick Open-Toe Ankle Boot, Endless.com

$74

Ankle boots are generally best left to the runway and other high-fashion areas.  They’re not sexy — I hate to say it, but they just aren’t.  They’re fashionable, but that’s another story.  Especially if you’re not wearing pants (and you hopefully aren’t, in bed), they just cut your leg off at the wrong place and make your calves look fat and short.  A lot of women have issues with their bodies as it is, do you really want to knowingly make yourself look fatter and shorter?

Other shoes to avoid: motorcycle boots, sneakers, clogs, ballet flats, slippers, and Crocs.

23 thoughts on “heels in bed

  1. Pleaser Black Women’s Seduce Patent Boots

    in my first look-see i misread this as “these boots are for black women”. ha, today is a not smart day.

    btw, if a “beginner” wifey’s husband watches too much of the wrong type of porn, he may take these the wrong way. i like ‘em and think they’re slutty in all the right ways, but they might impart a femdom-y vibe under other circumstances.

  2. Do you realize how small the fraction of women that would WANT to do this for man? And the fraction of this fraction that would actually look good doing it?

    We have a culture that allows this kind of sexuality to occur, which is potentially very exciting. But most women look too crappy (mostly because they are overweight) to engage in this such that her husband gets a stiff one.

    Its insane…but thats the USA for ya.

  3. NMH —

    Interesting comment.

    And the fraction of this fraction that would actually look good doing it?

    This makes me think that maybe you’re not living in the real world. Sure, the U.S. and other countries may have an obesity problem, but the majority of women — American and not — are not obese. It’s also important to remember that obesity charts rarely take into account body type (especially with regards to men), and that a lot of people technically classified as obese are actually, well, not. So even if you see a statistic that says 20 percent of Americans are obese, that doesn’t mean all of that 20 percent looks like this.

    That said, my real point is that most women — even the overweight ones — have little to worry about when it comes to wearing heels. I can see your point if I was touting some lace teddy or corset, but heels? Pretty much not gonna be affected by your weight.

  4. Well, your young and live on the west coast–if you live in southern CA, then most young women your age might look decent in high heels and a sexy get-up. Im mid 40’s in the south–most women at my age where I am located would look pretty silly; the reason being you have to have a decent body to pull it off. At my age, 80% of the women range from very overweight up.

    Also, high heels make good legs great, and great legs fantastic—but make bad legs (because they are too fat) look silly and gross.

    But yes, it can be a huge turn for a guy if you have the body for it.

    At least your willing to turn on your husband. If you are true to him and not a bitch, he’s hit gold. Only 1% of the guys out there (at my age) have this.

  5. Im mid 40′s in the south–most women at my age where I am located would look pretty silly; the reason being you have to have a decent body to pull it off. At my age, 80% of the women range from very overweight up.

    This is not what I’ve experienced, even in the south. A lot of women 40+ are overweight, but a lot are underweight…unless you maintain a healthy muscle-building workout regime, once your collagen starts to break down being thin is often less sexy than being thick. Anyway Diamond Foxxx (in my first post) is just about 40.

    At least your willing to turn on your husband.

    Hahaha, who said this was all for him? I love the way I look almost as much as he does (perhaps more).

  6. *sigh* Another presumably sexy woman who is a little too enamored with herself. Hot looks are great on women, but a over-sized ego is a huge turn off. Men might put up with that shit if hes getting an eyeful, though.

    I thought my ex looked great in strappy high heels, BTW. My current gf can’t wear heels.

    Maybe you should ask your man what heels he’d like to see you in? And then he chooses them for you. Perhaps that will be the beginning of getting your ego back to where it should be–submitted to his.

  7. correction: another guy on the internet with zero sense of humor.

    honestly, the autism that flies around this part of the web is getting really old.

    Maybe you should ask your man what heels he’d like to see you in? And then he chooses them for you.

    hah! you think i waste my own money on heels when he knows what he wants? you must be joking.

  8. I thought my ex looked great in strappy high heels, BTW. My current gf can’t wear heels.

    this might be projection on your part. it’s okay if you don’t like women in heels.

  9. BS. Your personality readily exposed your oversized ego based on your looks and I called you on it. Read any male blog and you are well within standard western woman behavior for a woman who is a 6 or above: 6’s think their 8’s, etc. You follow the trend line well.

    Not a surprise that your hubby buys ($$$) accessories for you to wear to stiffen his rod; it would be more appropriate to call yourself the “whorewife”, don’t cha think?

    “Don’t cha? Don’t cha”?

    No projection on my part. If a girl has good legs I love her to wear heels whenever possible, the higher the better. My current gf has all kinds of foot damage due to bad genetics and won’t wear them. It’s a loss, but she’s worth it.

  10. @nmh

    Maybe you should ask your man what heels he’d like to see you in? And then he chooses them for you. Perhaps that will be the beginning of getting your ego back to where it should be–submitted to his.

    Not a surprise that your hubby buys ($$$) accessories for you to wear to stiffen his rod; it would be more appropriate to call yourself the “whorewife”, don’t cha think?

    dude, at least pick one side, and stay on it

  11. I am not suggesting the appellation “whorewife” as a way to shame Ms Wifey at all. In fact, I think the strongest marriages out there are where the man has higher income and status then the woman, and he subsidizes her lifestyle. In fact, I think its great that Ms. Wifey is willing to wear sexy clothing to stiffen his rod, and if he pays for it, that’s fine. The deep nature of many successful man-woman relationships is transfer of a man’s money to the woman and she in return grants him sexual favors, which is functionally at the level of prostitution, it’s just legal. In most of these kinds of situations, the women has the responsibility to remain sexy for her man and a part of that maybe dressing in a provocative way that turns him on. Hence, why I suggest “whorewife” as a more appropriate term. No shaming, here, I think its great that a woman be a functional whore to her husband.

    Quite frankly, deep down I would much prefer to be in this kind of relationship, but where I live I simply don’t have the status and money to attract a very sexy woman who can wear high heels/skirts lingerie whatever and look great. In part this is because of the obesity epidemic and truly sexy women are extremely rare where I live, so their value is sky high.

    Men have to learn how to settle as much as women do.

  12. The deep nature of many successful man-woman relationships is transfer of a man’s money to the woman and she in return grants him sexual favors, which is functionally at the level of prostitution, it’s just legal.

    While I agree that this is true — many successful man-woman relationships are successful simply because of the “exchange” of respective goods — I also believe that if you’re in such a relationship then you (the male) have no right to complain about how your marriage ended when you lost your job.

    Reality check: back in the glory days of marriage 1.0, if a guy lost his job and didn’t hop to finding another one, it was divorce unless the woman didn’t have a choice (e.g. they lived in the middle of the prairie). Women didn’t “stick by their men” because they were so noble and good…they did it because their guy was bringing in the dough. Unless he wasn’t. In which case they were gone like the wind.

    Which is all fine, if you want that kind of thing. Me, I’d rather be in a relationship in which I don’t need him on a material level…I just want him.

    That said, I think it’s important to note that my lover buys me things he likes, not things I like (not that I don’t like them, but you get the point).

  13. heh. i was going to say “my hubby” but hubby is a stupid nickname and “my husband” sounds too formal. i’ll go back to calling you “the boy” if you like

  14. Heels in bed are indeed sexy, and I was lucky enough to have an ex-gf who did it, not just for me, but for herself ( she felt sexy in them too!).

    The thing with her, she is a corporate lawyer, and has a large collection of power executive woman type stilettos she wears to work. Expensive too ( well, corporate lawyer after all…). I know you say that pumps that you wear to the office don’t make good ‘heels in bed’ shoes, but those are the ones she’ll wear home and then keep on in bed.. and we both find it SEXY. She says it’s so erotic to go off to a meeting the next morning with a client knowing what the 4 inch pointy toe stilettos she is wearing were doing the night before! :)

  15. heels in bed are also great in terms of gift-giving: you’ve always got an automatic gift … that’ll benefit both of you.
    no more worries about “what to get the wife for ____ day” (if you had such worries in the first place).

  16. Those red pumps… Geezus. The wife has worn heels in bed a few times but nothing regular. I might have to change that now. Good post.

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