do you always dress like such a slut?

Heh.  This is funny.  I was checking trackbacks to my blog (yes, I do that), and I saw this comment by the lovely Lily over at Rivelino’s blog:

I’m not sure if it is just in the bedroom for sex or whether that’s her style all the time. She did say she lives in California though so it’s not like she lives in Manhattan. Style seems a bit Vegasy though which if memory serves me rightly is in Nevada not CA though close enough. As I said, may just be a bedroom thing. I like her though, she’s funny.

I just think this is awesome and hysterical.  That said, of course I don’t dress like that all the time.  Obviously.  I thought this would have been obvious, but I guess I was wrong.

Anyway, here’s what I do wear on a day-to-day basis (everything pictured is something from my closet):

Jeans

7 For All Mankind ‘Roxanne’ Skinny Jeans | $178

Jeans are totally the staple of my closet.  I love jeans.  Jeans forever!  Team denim!  You get my point.  I love jeans because they’re cute, practical, and easy to wear.  Also, they allow me to do things like climb trees, race motorcycles, and play football.  My favorite jeans: Seven, Armani, and Abercrombie.

T-shirts

Go Make Noise Double V-Neck Tee | $29

Yes, I’m not big on shirts that require a lot of work to put on.  And by “a lot of work,” I mean anything with a button, a zipper, or a clasp.  These things annoy me.  T-shirts are amazing.  My favorite brands: I like all t-shirts.  I don’t discriminate.

Short Skirts

A&F Blythe Skirt | $58

I wear mini-skirts, but they’re not mini-stripper-skirts.  I only wear skirts that can be worn with sneakers or flip-flops.

Sneakers

Skechers Shape-Ups Toners | $80

I’ve recently fallen in love with Sketchers Shape-Ups — not because they tone my calves (as far as I can tell, they don’t do this), but because they’re sparkly.

Other Footwear

Havaianas ‘Slim’ Flip Flop | $24

In the winter, I wear boots and skinny jeans, instead of sneakers (never wear sneakers with skinny jeans, unless they’re Chuck Taylors and you’re a hipster!  Even then, don’t do it!).  In the summer, I usually wear flip-flops (Havaianas, to be exact).  I sometimes wear wedges, and I rarely wear heels unless I’m “going somewhere.”

Big, Obnoxious Sunglasses

Dior ‘Classic 1’ Oversized Square Sunglasses | $275

The boy says I look like a bug.  I say, “Why you hate bugs?”

The Occasional Dress

Herve Leger | $1350

Sometimes I go all out and don a dress in a non-going-somewhere-context.  Usually short, but occasionally long.  I do love Herve Leger.

full-time vs. part-time homemakers

I note this comment over at Alte’s blog, by David Collard:

My wife seems to manage to do both. She works weekdays, except Wednesday, which she basically takes off to catch up on washing (laundry) and sometimes shopping. She does most of the traditional housewife stuff but also earns some money in a more junior position than mine. I earn the bulk of (but not all) the money. I do home handyman (some) on the weekends. I think we are a bit overstretched, especially as we have three children, two of whom are on the autism spectrum.

And Alte’s response:

May I suggest that:

1. Your wife has much more income to her disposal than many/most housewives.
2. Your wife is not raising young children.
3. Your wife is not homeschooling.
4. You are not often away for long business trips.
5. If your wife is a part-time homemaker she will not accomplish as much as a full-time homemaker, and you simply do not miss the things she isn’t doing.

In other words, she manages to do it because she is doing less than I am, and she has more support and help than I do.

Which prompts the question (but does not beg it), are full-time homemakers doing it for themselves, or for their husbands and families?  The traditional response is that they are doing it for their husbands and families, and that they should be content and happy to work for such amazing “bosses.”  Fine, I don’t have contention with the idea that working to better the lives of the people you care about is a good thing (though it’s extremely idealistic to imagine most people will see it this way — sorry, that’s just the way the world works).

But I’m not sure that full-time homemakers are doing it for their husbands and their families.  Barring the existence of young — and we’re talking not-in-school (I don’t believe in homeschooling, but that’s a topic for another time) — children, a full-time homemaker is likely not improving the lives of her husband and/or children enough to warrant zero paid working hours.

As Alte says, “a part-time homemaker will not accomplish as much as a full-time homemaker, and you simply do not miss the things she isn’t doing.” And there’s the issue.  If the husband and/or children do not miss the things she isn’t doing, i.e. they are not critical for the happiness and health of the family, then why is she doing them?  I’m not talking about things that the husband is just “taking for granted” — no, because when you take something for granted you don’t miss it until it’s gone…but you do miss it, when it’s gone.  I’m talking about little homemaker flourishes that men don’t even notice — when it’s there, or when it’s not there.

As I stated in an earlier post, I am far from “a housewife.”  A commenter pointed out that perhaps my husband simply “forgives” me for not doing as much housework, because I’m tremendously sexy:

A husband only cares about his wife not doing enough housework if the house is a COMPLETE disaster, or if other areas are lacking. Based on this post, you do enough work around the house so that it doesn’t turn to hell, and based on other blog posts, you sex your husband up enough to the point that he should be a happy man. So yeah, you’re not a housewife but I’m sure it’s forgiven, lol.

Now, it’s true that my husband and I are always forgoing productive tasks in favor of sex, but that likely has little to do with his non-issues about me and my non-housewifeyness.  The reader did touch on the root of the issue, which is that the husband usually only cares “if the house is a COMPLETE disaster.”  Quite frankly, men often have lower standards when it comes to basic housework than do women.  It’s not until the laundry hasn’t been done for about two months, that my husband even takes note.  And this usually has little to do with the growing pile of laundry overtaking our laundry room, and more to do with the fact that he’s run out of socks.

Luckily for my husband, I have all the housework standards of a teenage boy.  So while we both do a little housework here and there, neither of us really notices if the house is going to hell until one of our friends says they’re coming over to hang out.  Then, of course, comes the mad dash to put everything in the spare room and close the door.  The point is this: I could cook and clean all day long, and my husband would hardly notice it.  In fact, if I were to clean all day I’m sure my husband would just feel uncomfortable, and like he didn’t live there.

My mother is impeccably neat and organized.  My father is not.  When my mother asks my father to clean something, he does what he thinks is a great job, but what is barely up to the standard of my mother.  Is the moral of this story that my mother is just that much better at housework?  No, it’s that my mother is an obsessive-compulsive crazy person who would find most hospitals to be full of uncleanliness.  When my mother is working, is there a drop in her housework and homemaking?

Yes.

Thank god.

 

outfit inspiration: white

My husband loves white slutty clothes.  Not because they’re slutty so much, but because they’re white.  (And if you’re wondering, yes, he did love my glittery, pearl- and rhinestone-embellished ballgown of a wedding dress.)

Adorable Bride Outfit, $82.95 | Dreamgirl White Jacquard Reversible Corset, $56.95 | 3 Piece Peasant Top Skirt Set, $32.95

White Bridal Corset and Skirt Set, $68.95 | Strapless Gown with Sequin Mesh Waterfall Skirt, $107.95 | Tube Dress With Large Chrome Sequins, $65.95

Sexy Chiffon Veil with Satin Headband, $14.01 | BodyZone Goddess of Resurrection Lace Tri-Top Set, $19.95 | Lace Top Thigh High Bridal Stockings, $8.95

Solid Pleated Skirt with Side Zippers, $26.95 | Tattoo Skirt, $21.95 | Hanky Panky ‘I Do’ Low-Rise Thong, $32

Aldo ‘Gutenberg’, $75 | Pleaser Thigh High Exotic Dancer Boots, $75.99 | Pleaser White 6-inch Ankle Strap Platform Stripper Shoes, $33.24

wifey material

I followed a link from Paige’s blog to PMAFT’s blog, at which there’s an article lamenting the lack of women who are full of wifely goodness.  I’ll go ahead and say it right now — I agree with Paige, Sir PMAFT is being a bit of a drama queen.

That said, the article illustrates more than PMAFT’s melodramatic soul when it comes to the modern day woman.  It also illustrates just why the men of The Spearhead/MGTOW are never going to get what they want.  Because, you know, they have no idea what they want.

PMAFT says:

There’s a long list of issues that make women below marriage quality.  Some of these issues are as basic as lacking cooking knowledge.  A better way of putting that would be a lack of basic life skills knowledge.  Lots of women are varying degrees of being entitlement princesses.  Many women have assimilated feminist contempt and hate for men, and that includes conservative, and tradition church going women who insist they are “not feminists”.  Most women are completely unsuitable for motherhood.

Ah, yes, the epic list.  Lacking cooking knowledge!  Entitlement princesses!  Man haters!  Unsuitable mothers!

Look, I’m not saying that the modern-day woman is a domestic goddess who will settle for the first random dude who comes along and bask in his manly glory, because she isn’t.  That said, ragging on women’s cooking skills is just stupid, considering that anyone with half a brain can whip up a decent meal.  In fact, because most young adults live on their own for at least some period of time before settling down, they’re actually quite good at whipping up a decent meal (and on a budget, too).  As for the other chores, again, it gets did somehow.  And hey, here’s the good news: if she’s never lifted a finger to do laundry or cook, that means you’ve got yourself a sugar mama!

As for the rest of it — entitlement princessery, hatred for men, blah blah blah, this is a complaint I only hear from one type of guy.  Hint: it’s not the type of guy women want.  I’ll agree, though, it is unfortunate for some of the betas out there that they are now expected to bring it.

And just a note on women being unsuitable for motherhood — most people are completely unsuitable for parenthood until, oh HELL NO, nature throws them a baby or two.  Especially back in the day when people were more prone to popping out babies at 14 or 15?  I can say with a fair degree of accuracy that these kids were not models of epic parentdom.

More PMAFT:

Sexual behavior is a huge problem too.  Even among traditional church going women you’re still not going to find any virgin women (if we’re talking about a traditional Christian perspective of marriage quality women) outside of isolated and obscure communities and churches which you will never be able to access since you weren’t born into them.

If, and only if, you, as a man, are saving yourself for your future wife — in other words, you are a virgin yourself, then fine.  Find a sexy virginal girl and marry away.  But if you’re not a virgin, then not only can you not complain, but you should be seriously worried about a girl past her teenage years who is still a virgin.  Because, damn — she cold.

PMAFT words:

Except for men willing to go expat (and there’s a shrinking number of destinations available for this), very few men should get married.

Oh, right, because women who are willing to marry outside their culture/race/country are really going to be paragons of wifely femininity.  If she’s willing to deny her family, culture, country, and language for you, she wants your money.  If there’s one good thing we can say about American women, it’s that they’re less — not to be confused with “not” — mercenary than other women.

Ultimately, this is what I see guys complaining about — and honestly, that’s only on the internet…the guys I know in real life are chillaxin’, getting laid, and generally fine with the world — the lack of women who are willing to be paragons of domestic wifeyness for one thing in return: ca$h.  These guys complain that they are guys with stable, well-paying jobs and so…they should have some girl doting on them when they get home.

Seriously, that’s it.  When you ask what they have to bring to the table, they can’t come up with anything except some excuse of, “Back in the 1950’s I would’ve had a wife who would have loved my financial stability.”

Obsidian said it well over at Alte’s blog:

I love the idea of being able to appeal to a Woman on the basis of me alone; that she has chosen me, not because I’m a meal ticket or because she couldn’t do any better, but because I was able to effectively make my case as a Man and in having strong seduction skills. I don’t need money, education or “status”; I only need these. All of the Women I’ve dealt with had more formal education than myself, and in many cases outearned me; they all could have chosen to marry that Big Law, doctor or MBA type and live a sedate life out in the burbs but didn’t, and chose me instead. When I asked them why, they all told me the same thing – because said guys were “boring” – in other words, they lacked GAME.

Excellently put.